#34. Hit or Miss
MACHIKO'S ONE THOUSAND AND ONE NIGHTS #34
tl by danluffey
#34. Hit or Miss
1: It just seems like you have no real dedication to the company.
sign: Otowa Trading
2: You never want to work overtime, and you're always taking private phone calls at work.
3: And whenever we're counting on you to do certain jobs, we always find you in the bathroom fixing your makeup!
4: You're ride to our clients, and you don't use polite language when we get calls from the outside!
5: So you want me to quit, right?
6: /I'm not the kind of person who can work hard day after day at a job like this.
7: I quit
8: /I'm so sick of living under all these regulations!
9: You switched jobs again? Oh, Nori-chan...
1: I'm so jealous of you, auntie. All you need to do is say stuff to people, and you get money.
sign: Ooya Shizu Fortunetelling
2: That's not exactly how it works.
3: I study hard in order to give the proper answers. Fortunetelling is a type of statistical calculation.
4: My customers are all troubled over something.
5: Fortunetellers give people hope and courage. They exist to give people advice and help them find better ways to be happy.
6: /She's always so serious like this... that's probably why she never got married.
7: /She rents a little corner in a mall, and sometimes goes on TV to do marriage fortunetelling for celebrities.
8: (Wh-who's going to marry me?!
9: /Since I'm her niece, sometimes she gives me some allowance. She's really the only unique relative I have...
1: Why can't you just relax?
3: Huh? Aunt Shizu collapsed?
5: Ahh... I can't stay down like this... I need to go back to work... my customers...
6: You can't push yourself!
7: Auntie... I'll give out the fortunes in your place!
8: I've been studying fortunetelling a lot recently! I'll take your place until you get better!
10: I'll write all my strategies in a notebook for you... if you listen to their birthdays and take notes, you should be able to find the answers...
11: OK, I got it!
1: /Yeah right! That was so easy. Of course I haven't studied any fortunetelling. It's sooo boring!
2: /I'll just say whatever I want and take their money!
3: Please, help me.
4: Marriage fortunetelling? Please write your full name, where you were born, and your birth date.
5: Also, the names of your parents. When you sleep, which direction does your pillow point toward?
6: Huh? What does that have to do with anything?
7: A lot.
8: /All I need to do is say that to convince them!
9: Place your hand on this.
1: Calm your heart... and then, in your mind, think about your favorite color.
3: I see it...
4: People are quick to misunderstand you, aren't they?
5: /Pretty much everyone feels that way about themselves.
6: Y-yes, I am!
7: You often hold back in important moments and regret it later.
8: You have a strong sense of justice... and when it comes down to it, you're a good person. But it's hard for you to get others to feel that way...
9: /Everyone feels like this at some point.
1: Lately, you haven't been feeling well, have you?
2: /Yet another thing that...
3: No, I'm fine!
4: /...almost everyone feels. Don't panic!
5: You just haven't noticed the symptoms yet. You should be careful.
6: Now, for your marriage fortunetelling... something happened when you were 21, didn't it?
8: /Something had to have happened! Ah well.
9: Try to remember.
10: /This will still work, even if nothing happened.
11: Someone close to you... it was something to do with someone near to you. You two never noticed each other's feelings, so you drifted apart without ever coming together.
13: And in the future... ahh... I'm sensing something...
1: I can sense someone near to you... in these next sixth moments, you will grow near to someone.
2: I-in six months?! Kyaa!
3: Get yourself together, or you may miss your chance.
4: Ahhh! OK, what should I do?
5: Live without being too picky about who you talk to.
6: Look at men with an open mind, and the right one will come to you.
7: /Just obvious stuff!
8: /But it's enough to make her happy. And if she lives positively, she'll find a chance sooner or later.
9: (She was spot on! She knew my personality right off the bat!
11: /As long as she starts looking for someone to marry, she's bound to find someone. And I made sure to phrase my answer so that if she doesn't find him, she'll just think "I missed my chance." She'll continue to trust me no matter what happens!
1: /Fortunetelling is surprisingly easy.
2: I have a weak body...
3: /And... yet you're out and about like this...
4: /You aren't pale, and you're breathing fine...
5: How can I become strong?
6: It's simple. You need to brighten yourself up. Every morning when you wake up, whisper "I feel so good today" three times.
7: That attitude will make you stronger.
9: For now, what I see is... even if you get a small sickness,
10: there are no large illnesses in your future.
11: Oh, that's a relief!
12: I want to buy stocks.
1: /I bet this guy's the greedy type. The kind who counts his chickens before they're hatched...
2: You shouldn't get too greedy. Buy something small and sell it just for a little bit. That will lead you to true happiness.
4: Thank you very much.
5: I've felt so much better lately. It's all thanks to you, sensei.
6: /"Sensei?" Hieeee!
7: Thanks to you, I didn't lose too much. I'm really glad I listened to you, sensei.
8: /Hiiiee! Hiiiee!
9: I hear she really hits it right on the mark!
10: Everyone who gets advice from her becomes so lucky!
11: Next please!
1: /I did it! I'm a hit now!
2: Unfortunately incidents keep happening.
TV: Fortune Corner
3: Sadly, the number of people who become sick due to stress is increasing.
4: All I have to do is say something really obvious and make it sound like I know what I'm talking about.
5: People only come to fortunetellers so they can hear that it'll all be OK.
6: I made so much money that I was able to get this nice apartment!
7: This is way better than being an office lady!
8: But now that I think about it... if I had given this sort of advice to my co-workers at my old job... I probably would have been able to go on doing it.
1: Eh, whatever.
2: Office ladies all get the same pay no matter how hard they work.
3: No matter how hard you try to support and advise people, it'll have no effect on your pay.
4: /But Fortunetelling is completely different! The more you care about people, the more money you earn!
5: Your tendency to worry is what's making you sick.
6: But nothing is truly wrong with you, so please, be at ease.
7: Oh, really? So it was just a mental thing...
8: You need to be patient now. If you work hard, eventually, your business will turn around.
1: /If what you say checks out, you'll get popular. But even if what you say doesn't check, people will just say "but it was just fortunetelling, so it was stupid of me to believe it"
book: Ooya Noriko - How to See the Future
2: Are you really studying, Nori-chan? You have to make sure you're working your hardest for your customers, or else it's rude.
3: They're desperate to cling on to anything, so you really need to answer them seriously.
4: I know that, auntie.
5: If you keep worrying like that, you'll never get better.
6: /In other words, I just need to keep making money! Look at me! I'm famous now!
7: Kyaaa! Please, sign this for me! I always watch you on TV!
8: This way to Ooya Noriko-sensei's autograph signing!
1: Next, please! Stay in a single-file line, now!
3: I believed what you said... then the doctor told me it was too late.
4: Me too...
5: You said I just needed to be patient...
6: But then I went bankrupt! I got stuck with all my loans!
7: H-hold on a minute...
8: I have no choice but to commit suicide with my family now!
9: Um, sirs...
1: Well that's what you get!
2: It's your fault for only relying on fortunetelling!
3: How can you say that? You have responsibility for this too!
4: Originally I was only going to come and complain to you...
5: but in that case!
7: I didn't do anything... gyaaaahh!
8: Ahh... aaahhh...
1: /How can this be happening?! I thought I had finally found happiness...
2: I believed you! How could you say those things?!
3: You liar!
4: /I wish I had just stayed as an office lady...
Machiko's One Thousand and One Nights Vol. 2 / END
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